Banned - Do you even PTSD?

Expectations. What are your expectations of me? Do you even PTSD? Did you know that every case of PTSD is different? I've had online debates with certified professionals, you know them as doctors, who insisted everyone who had PTSD was the same. This was years ago and fortunately the understanding has improved dramatically but the general public still lags in their knowledge. But this doctor finally came around to understanding that, although the symptoms might look the same, every person presents differently due to many variables. Stop treating everyone the same! Listen & Remember.

My experience is that people, most people, don't really care about the details. That is a problem but its even worse when its someone who supposedly is a friend, family member or a person you interact with on a regular basis like a Pastor, coworker, or business associate. For instance, if I tell you I have memory issues as a result, especially when stressed, then you might want to take note (Matthew 11:15, Mark 4:9, and Luke 8:8). If, as a person with PTSD and a faulty memory, I can remember some things about you, why can't you remember one thing about me? PTSD and the resulting faulty memory doesn't mean I forget everything but often forgot various things I wouldn't otherwise forget if everything was "normal". I'm not talking about the universal complaint of men forgetting what their wives have said, ask my wife and you'll understand. To many people think its just an excuse, live in my world for 5 minutes and you'll understand how wrong you are. Stop treating my forgetfulness like its just the everyday male forgetfulness thing, ITS NOT!

Understanding & Patience

You can tell me to read the rules a thousand times, I may remember for a while but then sometime in the future...I won't even think about it, like I never read it, it won't occur to me...then BAM...it hits me like a ton of bricks, how did I not remember that? I have done things for days, weeks, months at a time and the next thing I know I'm thinking "why haven't I done this for the last 3 months?". Its not on purpose that I violated some social compact, community standards or unwritten rules everyone knows! Its the life I now live, its an every day issue, I can make post-its and lists every where and I'd probably forgot to read them! You'd never understand this unless you knew me 15-20 years ago. I still have the green army notebooks with lists 4 pages long for each day of items that I couldn't forget about, even though I had them in my head and could manage multiple tasks going on a one time. YOU HAVE NO IDEA! I'm not trying to break the rules. Stop treating my forgetfulness as the average "could careless" attitude lots of people display.

Healing vs Impressing Yep, I get it. You have your business, community, reputation to worry about. I have no issues with that at all. I'll not condemn you, I won't speak against you, I'll still support you, etc. You may think this is splitting hairs but its not about you banning me. Its about you actually giving a damn about people who you have made a connection with that have PTSD. Its about the destruction it brings to the person with PTSD mental well being. When you get frustrated with someone and ban them you miss an opportunity to help that VETERAN. Sure there are those who will act stupid, PTSD is not an excuse for bad behavior, but forgetfulness leading to being banned for violating rules is not, in and of itself "bad behavior"with intent. I'd rather you chastise me, give me the chance to repent, apologize and ask for forgiveness. Forgiveness (Ephesians 4:32) goes a long ways in helping the Veteran to heal but it does little, juxtaposing giving or raising a bunch of cash, in impressing (Philippians 2:3) your community.

I've experienced more Veterans thanking me for taking the time to listen, understand and to show actually concern for them than anyone thanking me for the money. Perhaps this is why so many Veterans fall through the cracks of agencies like the Veterans Administration, DAV, American Legion, etc. They get treated like a number, a fund raising opportunity, just another person looking for something free. Forgive one another 70 x 7 (Matthew 18:22), love one another like He has loved you - (John 13:7), brothers keeper - (Genesis 4:1-13)